Being a good parent is not easy, which is why millions of married couples are studying various books and manuals on how to properly treat their child. Many moms and dads have already been successful with the 12 parenting tips. So what is their secret? What rules do they follow to create a harmonious relationship with their children?
1. Patience at the limit is normal
How often it happens that children do not pay attention to the remarks of their parents, and sometimes even violently resist their instructions. When a critical moment comes, moms and dads give up - give in to the child. In doing so, they want to keep the peace, with patience, they want to be "good parents." But thus parents lose their authority - if the children press hard, they will get what they want under pressure.
It is important to remember that everyone can lose patience, we are all human and everyone can lose their temper, there is nothing wrong with that. It is actually difficult to contain anger and irritation, especially if the children do everything as if it were evil. The child must understand that you do not like this behavior, you cannot be led by your son or daughter. Allow your emotions to manifest, and do not harbor them inside yourself, let your child and yourself know that you do not agree with the situation. The accumulated negative will eventually find a way out, only then all family members can suffer, and children most of all.
2. Teach your child to enjoy the toy, not count its price
When purchasing an expensive toy for a baby, parents often ask to treat it with special trepidation, constantly reminding them how much it costs. But for a child it does not matter, because he still cannot evaluate things and objects based on their monetary costs.
The understanding of the value of money will come to him later, and when children are small, they are equally interested in playing with both simple trinkets and expensive toys.... Even playing with a simple piece of paper or a bag sometimes seems more fun to them than playing with a radio-controlled helicopter.
3. Punishment is a manifestation of love
Do you consider yourself a bad parent when you have to punish your children? When a son or daughter does stupid things, you have the right to be angry with them, and therefore punish them. Censure is a loving measure; without it, the child will not learn to see the boundaries of what is permitted.
Timely punishment helps children understand that every action they do has consequences., they grow up as people who know how to be responsible for their actions. Remember that being good parents does not mean at all that you need to turn a blind eye to the bad behavior of your child and allow everything to him.
4. Don't be afraid to refuse
How nice it is to answer affirmatively to all the kids' requests, because they are so sincerely happy! But a constant “yes” can lead to relationship problems several years later. A child who is not accustomed to refusals will eventually demand more and more, what should parents do then? Will they be able to fulfill all the whims and requests of a teenager?
Do not be afraid to refuse young children for the time being, show firmness when necessary by saying your firm “no”. When you refuse a child for the first time, you may be rebuffed in the form of tears, whims, tantrums, but do not give in, if the decision is made, stick to your word. Having once yielded to the baby under the influence of whims, it will subsequently become even more difficult to refuse him something else.
5. Raise your children to be independent
Not trusting children to do small tasks around the house, doing all the work for them, you will achieve only one thing - when they grow up, they will not be able to do basic things, such as heating their own food or washing the dishes. It is necessary to accustom the child to independence from early childhood. Contact them with a request to help collect toys, dust off.
If the daughter wants to wash the plate, let her, even if the result is not the best, still praise the girl for her initiative and diligence. Never tell a child that he will not succeed, do not do the work for him. Such words will discourage anyone from taking on any business in the future. By doing this, parents do not give their kids the opportunity to develop independence.
6. Do not deprive yourself of the right to rest
The responsibility to raise children is a work that requires constant effort and attention, and it is also 24/7. You can't leave her, get a vacation too. But moms and dads still need to rest to recuperate. Sometimes it is worth taking a so-called day off.
Teach your child to understand your needs for sleep and rest... Explain that while mom is lying down, children can do something interesting - draw, mold a plasticine figurine, or just watch cartoons. Teach them to play quietly and not ask their mom over and over when she is resting. However, observe the measure - kids should not be left unattended for a long time, you will be rested, but the child will be left to himself.
7. Form a habit of eating right from an early age
Adequate and proper nutrition at an early age is what you need to teach your children, because human health depends on it. If you choose healthy foods yourself, let your child adopt this habit from you. It is a mistake to believe that while children are young, they can eat everything - both sweets and chips. This does not mean that babies should only eat cereals and vegetables, but you should not add fast food or other unhealthy foods to their daily diet..
The greatest danger here is represented by grandmothers - they constantly think that their grandchildren are hungry, offering them either pies or pancakes. Tactfully, but strictly explain to elderly relatives that, showing excessive care and love for babies, they harm their health.
8. Having children is not the end of life
Being a parent doesn't mean giving up your own interests and entertainment. Of course, moms and dads don't have as much time to meet friends and go to the movies as they used to, when the children were not yet born. But you cannot completely deprive yourself of some kind of emotional relief. It is important to learn how to combine parenting with your interests, to find a middle ground.
9. Take an interest in your child's life
By showing interest in what your baby does and enjoys, you build a solid foundation for good relationships in the future. In early childhood, your child can enthusiastically tell you about Pokémon, Peppa Pig and other favorite characters, new toys and cartoons.
By delving into the words of children, getting to know their world, you become close friends. When the baby grows up, he will begin to share with you already more adult problems and hobbies, knowing that you will not dismiss him, but support and listen.
10. Parents need to be able to ask for forgiveness
To base your upbringing on the principle “mom is always right” and stubbornly not to admit your mistakes is fundamentally wrong. Everyone is wrong - both children and adults. And since you are teaching your child to ask for forgiveness for their wrongdoings, be so kind as to follow your own rules and also admit your guilt.
Yes, it can be difficult, but there is nothing shameful about it. Such objective observance of the rules in your family will allow you to build harmonious and warm relations with your child on an equal footing.
11. The limit has come - take a time out
There are situations when the atmosphere heats up almost to the limit, when emotions, replacing each other, overwhelm and are ready to splash out. In this case, it is worth taking a time out - ask your grandmother or friend to take the children for at least an hour or two to give yourself the opportunity to regain peace of mind.
Feel that the peak of emotional overexcitement is coming, stop, go to another room for at least 20 minutes, take a shower, think about your upcoming trip to the sea. This will help you avoid a lot of conflict situations and learn to stay calm.
12. Your kids are the best in the world
For parents, their child, even an adult (namely, a child for you, he will be both 5 and 45) will always be the best, most beautiful, intelligent, sweet and kind. Do not be afraid of your feelings, but show them as often as possible.... Some moms and dads believe that excessive love and care will only spoil their children, so they begin to criticize them. Do not deprive the child of support and tenderness, because they are the ones that work more effectively than any educational measures.
