A male perspective on a woman's pregnancy and future fatherhood. Shock, fear and panic are the feelings that many men experience when they hear about the imminent birth of a child.
You told the man the good news of your pregnancy, and he did not behave the way you expected. Fell into a stupor, and says nothing. Isn't he happy to be a father?
Is silent and does not look into the eyes
One of two things: either he is still in shock from the fact that he will soon become a dad, or he was scared. And he does not look into the eyes because he is ashamed to admit it.
Most likely, a man needs time to accept future fatherhood. Mentally realizing this news, he will find the right words to talk with his soul mate.
"I need to be alone"
A man must get used to the idea that he will soon become a father. The stronger sex is much more restrained in their emotions than women. Strong feelings often unsettle men. There is nothing you can do, give him the opportunity to calmly think about the situation and get used to his new status.
If your man is afraid of losing his freedom of action, explain to him that having a baby is not a prison sentence, and that you will take on most of the worries about the baby.
Runs away from home
Leaving home is a common reaction of a future father. Most likely, he needs to share the news with parents or friends, ask for advice. Or he needs to comprehend an important event alone.
The main thing is that he does not run away for good. Throwing a pregnant woman is mean. You still have to pay child support.
Leaves your words on deaf ears
Typical psychological defense. The news came as a big surprise for the man, and at the subconscious level he seems to not hear what you are trying to tell him about. Be calm about what is happening. Give the man time to accept the situation.
Closes in itself
Most likely, the man is overcome by doubts. What if he will be a bad father and will not be able to adequately raise an heir? Often men make excessive demands on themselves, especially if they have a developed sense of responsibility.
The future father must understand that the child after birth will be with the mother all the time. After two to three months, the feeling of anxiety will dissolve into the daily care of the child. The experience of friends who became fathers will also come in handy.
Falls into panic
The so-called "midlife crisis" is to blame, which worries a man long before the age of 30. At any age, men are afraid of getting old.
Try to convince your man that becoming a father will not turn him into an old man, but will simply grow up. Old and adult are not the same thing.
Experiencing depression
Painful childhood memories can be the reason why a man does not want to become a father. In his imagination, he paints negative pictures from the past, and does not want the child to be in his place.
If the cause is children's fears, a psychologist will help you cope with the situation and heal mental wounds. It is important for a man to realize that not all parents are like his mother and father. What will be the childhood of a son or daughter largely depends on him.
READ ALSO: Male depression after childbirth
Such manifestations of feelings are a typical reaction to such important news for any man. However, don't jump to conclusions. Of course, it takes time for a man to realize his future fatherhood and accept the situation. If you convince your loved one that for you he is the best husband and father, his confusion will be replaced by joy and delight!
READ ALSO:
- The husband does not want children: possible reasons and tactics for overcoming them
- How to know if your husband wants a child
