Many young mothers practice sleeping together with their children. Psychologists believe that this is good for the newborn, he needs warmth and care. He hears the pounding of his mother's heart and remembers his life before birth, when he was comfortable and calm. At first, quality rest and food are the foundations of the baby's health and development. Next to her mother, the baby quickly relaxes and plunges into a sweet dream.
Baby
Joint sleep up to a year
Children under one year old often wake up at night. They eat often, but little. Artists who eat strictly by the hour are able to rest until their morning meal. Breastfed babies require the next portion of their mother's milk up to five times a night. Therefore, it is more convenient when the baby sleeps close by, you do not need to get up, take him out of the crib to feed or calm him down.
Sharing sleep does not pose any danger if you follow the precautions:
- Do not use pillows and blankets for the child, so that they do not get entangled and block the air flow. It is convenient to use tension sheets. Laundry must be clean and ironed;
- Purchase a mattress firm enough for an infant to rule out spinal problems;
- Do not place the child in the center of the bed, between the parents. Ideally, he should be near his mother, so that on the other side there is a wall or obstacle that will prevent him from falling out of bed;
- Put a roller between mom and baby, for example, from a towel. This will create his own territory. In addition, the roller will prevent the mother from harming the baby if she turns uncomfortably.
The advantages and disadvantages of sleeping together
Sharing a child's sleep with his mother has many advantages:
- An emotional connection is established;
- The baby becomes calmer, feeling mother's warmth and hearing her heartbeat. It reminds him of the time before birth, he feels protected;
- The baby's sleep becomes longer;
- Mom rests more, because she does not need to constantly get up and calm the baby. Feeding at night occurs automatically, half asleep, so fatigue does not accumulate;
- Parents' anxiety is reduced, because there is no need to go somewhere to, for example, check if the baby is cold or, conversely, if he is too hot.
Mom exhausted by night climbs
Some experts believe that at night the mother can harm the child, hit him or push him. Usually women wake up from any rustle or awkward movement, if there is a baby next to them. This happens at the level of instincts that awaken with the appearance of a baby. The exceptions are cases when a young mother is taking sleeping pills or drinking alcohol. Then sleeping together cannot be called safe.
Note! It is believed that when a child sleeps with his mother for a long time, he becomes too dependent on adults. The grown up baby completely relies on the parents and cannot make a decision or make a choice.
Does the baby need to sleep separately
For a child to grow up independent, he must have a personal space, his own bed, and ideally a room. It's not scary if the baby sleeps with his mother for up to a year, this will not affect his development. Some children move to cribs at will, without tears and tantrums. This can happen either in a year or after three years. Others sleep in their cradles from birth and grow up calm. It is mothers who teach babies to sniff sweetly at their side, take them to their place in the morning to sleep longer. If everyone is happy with this, then there is nothing to worry about. The main thing is that all family members feel comfortable.
Shared sleep
Important! Psychologists say that sleeping with a mother for a newborn is only good for him. In the first 4-5 weeks, it is simply necessary for the baby. Separation from his mother is a great stress for him.
It is possible to determine that the baby is ready for relocation by increasing the duration of deep sleep. If earlier the baby often flinched and opened his eyes to check if everything was in order, then over time he begins to wake up less often. This usually becomes noticeable after 9 months. Some babies eat less at night at six months and are able to sleep for about 6-7 hours in a row. In this case, you can gradually transfer the baby to his own bed. It is important not to miss this moment if you want to carry out the resettlement painlessly. After all, a caring mother still continues to sleep sensitively, worrying about the child. Naturally, he feels this, which can affect the quality of his rest.
Ways to wean from co-sleeping
When weaning from co-sleeping, the main thing is to act gradually, but also purposefully. You cannot deviate from your plan, pitying the child or referring to your own fatigue. Children do not understand such behavior, why yesterday it was possible to sleep with mom, but today again it is impossible. Therefore, the main thing is not to doubt what was conceived and to enlist the support of other family members.
To understand how to wean a child from sleeping with his mother painlessly for him, you can use the following tips:
- Start with a nap. Lay the baby in his crib in the light of the sun and always be near;
- At night, transfer to the cradle when the baby falls asleep. It's not scary that he will ask back. It is good if the time of his stay in his own bed increases. You need to go to the goal confidently, but not in a hurry;
- First, put the baby's cradle next to the parent's bed so that it is at arm's length from the mother, and gradually move it away. If the baby is already crawling, then it's good if he has the opportunity to return to his parent's bed at any time. The main thing is that it is safe, and he does not fall. When a baby bed is next to an adult, it is convenient for everyone. The kid sees the parents and knows that they are close, but, nevertheless, he sleeps in a separate personal territory, the space is delimited;
- Do not immediately take the child by the side at the first cry. You can go to the bed, stroke him, talk, offer water. Perhaps this will be enough for the baby and he will continue to sleep. If the baby does not calm down, and you have to take him in your arms, you should not accustom him to motion sickness. Otherwise, next time you will have to wean from them;
- For older children, sleep rituals are suitable. These are actions that are repeated every day. For example, after bathing, the baby eats, then puts on his pajamas, listens to a fairy tale and goes to bed. The child should like his sleeping place. With a two-year-old baby, you can choose bed linen, a night light. If he is involved in the process of settling and moving, then he will more happily go to sleep in a new place.
Joyful baby in his crib
Potential Difficulties in Weaning
When weaning a baby, a mother must be confident in her actions. The child will feel doubtful and nervous. If mom is calm and understands that she is doing the right thing, the move will be painless for the baby. He must know that this is the final decision, and the parents do not intend to back down from it.
Important! You do not need to accustom the baby to his crib during illness or when he is teething. Also, do not combine this event with other stressful situations, for example, moving to a new apartment.
It is impossible to take away the sleeping place from the crumbs abruptly when a brother or sister appears. A new person in the house is already a reason for worry, if the child also loses his usual positions, this is a reason for serious frustration. The kid will shed many tears. The move should take place in stages and in peace.
If the child asks to return, there is no need to push him away or chase him away. You cannot go to another room when the baby is screaming. It used to be believed that this is an effective way. It is enough for the baby to cry, and he will no longer be upset, and the next day he will calmly go to bed alone. In reality, a child may lose confidence that parents will come to his aid and protect him at any time.
The joint sleep of mother and child does not lead to negative consequences. The main thing is that it suits all family members. If the baby is fine, but his dad suffers, feeling like a third-party, you should think about moving the baby to his own bed. Indeed, in this case, a joint dream can cause a breakdown in relations between spouses, which will affect the climate in the family and the emotional mood of the mother and baby. The main thing when moving a child to a crib is to show patience, pay a lot of attention to the baby, be caring and affectionate, at the same time not deviate from the intended goal.
