A small child bangs his head against the floor and walls, hits himself on the head with his fists. Councils and recommendations of psychologists.
With the birth of a child, parents try to mentally prepare for all the difficulties that may arise when raising a baby. No matter how psychologically prepared the parents are, there come times when the behavior of the baby enters into a stupor. One of such discouraging cases is the moment when a child for some reason begins to beat against the floor and walls, or alternatively, beat himself on the head with his fists.
Some of the parents scold themselves and blame them for improper upbringing, someone scolds the baby and takes them to a doctor for consultation. The most experienced parents simply ignore this childish trick.
The kid bangs his head on the floor and walls: causes and solutions to the problem
At whatever age the habit of banging your head on hard surfaces may appear, it will not cause much harm to the child. Every baby is born with an instinct for self-preservation. The only thing that can annoy parents is the presence of a bruise on the forehead. So, let's talk about why the child is banging his head and how you can solve the problems associated with such inappropriate behavior.
The desire to manipulate
Cause. Small children between the ages of one and three are psychologists of sorts. Forbid your child from taking something from the shelf, try to get him to eat the soup he doesn't like, and you will see how he will try to manipulate you. The kid will start banging his head against the wall or floor crying. Moreover, such blows may not be weak. Older children may use verbal threats to scare their parents by banging their heads on the floor.
Decision. Don't let your child manipulate you, don't stop him. On occasion, offer your child a pillow or other soft object to take out negative emotions on it.
The child bangs his head on the floor when he freaks out. Tantrums
Cause. Children often bang their foreheads on the floor in order to achieve some of their own selfish goals. For example, a baby asked to buy a toy or a chocolate bar in a store, but his mother refused (here it is not necessary in the store, the child may not get something at home). And then the kid will not miss the opportunity to test the patience of the parent with hysteria. This scene always looks the same: a child, sprawled on the floor, screams, squeals and, with tears in his eyes, beats his head on the floor.
Let's say a child wants to take a walk, but you can't go out with him at the moment. Then hysteria and hitting the floor begins again. It is also an attempt to express your resentment. Since he cannot throw out the entire stream of aggression on you, he takes it out on himself. Psychologists call this phenomenon autoaggression.
Decision. If a child perpetrates such a trick in a public place, then it is recommended not to pay attention to others and their judgmental views. Your child is not the only one doing this. The best solution to this problem is not to be led by his whims, otherwise such antics will not stop. Just pretend you're leaving. At some point, he will come to his senses, understand that the hysteria did not work, stand up and run after you. When he is able to listen to your words, discuss what happened with him. Say that you understand his feelings and yet you cannot buy what he wants.
If you can't take your child for a walk, suggest an alternative. Don't be categorical in your rejection. An unknown reason for your refusal can also serve as a reason for tantrums. Invite your toddler to watch cartoons, draw or play something else. Cases when such an alternative did not interest the child, and he continued to bang his head on the floor, should also be ignored or offered to vent his anger on soft objects. You can wash your child's face with cold water.
You need to defend your positions. The child must understand that not everything is allowed to him. But there are times when you can make concessions. For example, if you have prepared one clothes for the kindergarten, and the child wants to wear another. Do not deny him such trifles.
From the forum
My son is 2 g and 3 months .. constantly when he starts to be capricious and hysterical he starts to beat his head against everything in order to achieve his goal, I even tried not to pay attention to him, but my heart can’t stand it, I don’t know what to do, girls who have something like that faced a problem?
I would advise you to contact a neurologist. Better to pay. Psychologists comment on this problem as follows: the child tries to harm himself and hurt in cases of lack of attention, care and love from the mother. Try to spend more time with the child, doing something interesting and useful to him. Over time, things will get better.
At this age, children draw attention to themselves in different ways and each in his own way achieves the desired result. When our son wants something very much, but we don't give it, he falls to the floor. I consulted with a psychologist, she advised him to leave the room during his whims. There are no spectators, there will be no hysterics. I did so, so he sly got up and ran after me into another room and fell there. And I again left the room, my son again ran after me, but did not fall, I was carried away by something. I always do this now, our whims quickly cease. Try it yourself. Good luck !!!
There was such a problem at about the same age. Neurologists did not find any abnormalities, and I tried not to pay attention. How difficult it is! I went into another room and waited. At first, the hysterics lasted 10 minutes, then 5. And then he immediately stopped, as soon as he saw that there were no spectators))) This struggle lasted for about a month. Now my son is 10 years old, there are no problems with behavior, he is my first assistant in the house.
You need to see a neurologist. And I also recommend to a professional osteopath, he can determine the presence of a birth injury in the cervical spine, and if there is one, eliminate it. If a child has a birth trauma of this kind, then his behavior may be inadequate, as it is affected by the weather or other factors. Perhaps the fact is that in the presence of such an injury, oxygen does not enter the brain enough, since blood circulation is impaired, he begins to have a headache, and he cannot control his behavior. A professional doctor will better explain the problem to you. In any case, now your child needs more attention. It seems to me in such cases, first of all, you need to try to calm the child (take him in your arms, stroke, kiss, say sweet words), and then jointly solve the problem in a calm atmosphere, ask what he wants, let him try to express his opinion. At this age, they still speak poorly, so it is sometimes difficult to understand what the child wants, but you need to make the child understand that his opinion is important to you. If you understand what he wants, the situation will be easy to resolve. And if his desire at the moment cannot be fulfilled, then an alternative solution to the problem must be offered. Gradually, the child will learn to solve the problem in such a way that it will be easier for him and the kindergarten to interact with educators and peers. At least, my son and I always try to find a compromise, explain to him every time, explain five times sometimes.
My beauty arranged a similar thing in the spring on the street: she would lie straight in a puddle face down and yell, knocking with her feet, I just walk on to myself and that's all, despite the lamentations of grannies (mother is a viper and all that
Then the daughter realized that in a wet overalls you won't walk for a long time and you won't be spoiled by your mother
Now she turns on the "actress large and small", wringing her hands in a picturesque manner and depicting a whimper, while she spies on her hands, is there a reaction
)
To attract attention
Cause. When your child starts banging the back of his head against the wall again, pay attention to the expression on his face. The kid does not cry, but calmly plays with his toys. Simultaneously with these activities, he can look at his parents and even smile. So he observes the reaction of others.
Decision. In this case, you should not scold the baby. Ignore his way of getting your attention. His blows are not very powerful and therefore cannot harm. Over time, he will realize that this method does not work.
However, do not forget to hug and pat your child on the head. He should feel his need and your love for him.
From the forum
Girls help !!!! Daughter 1.3. A wonderful child, in some cases obedient, smart, but there is a big BUT !!!!! If something is wrong with her, she falls backward and bangs her head on the floor, the asphalt is shorter, no matter what, the main thing is her head. I didn’t pay attention, I left, said that her aunt would take her, a couple of times I didn’t slap her on the bottom. And all the devil is useless, I don't know what to do, she's going to beat off all her brains !!!!!! So she began to cry with a cry, on the 4th day she could not stand it !!!! Help, tell me !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The child will be checked: how you can behave, and how you cannot.
If the child gives out "trial" tantrums, ie those that end as soon as the requirement is fulfilled, then let him know that you will not fulfill his requirements just because he is lying on the floor. In this case, there is no need to get angry, swear. you need to show that you are not going to give in.
If tantrums are caused by an uncontrolled outburst of emotions, then you need to take the baby, hug, explain to him that this is an outbreak, explain why it happened: “you are tired, you were offended” and so on. Watch when a tantrum occurs. can change the regime, avoid noisy groups for a while, etc.
Trying to relax and sleep
Cause. A child may bounce their head on hard surfaces from overexertion after a hard day. This is how he tries to relax before bed. Anger and tension are read on the baby's face. How many parents do not distract the child, it does not bring results. The reason for this act may be increased intracranial pressure.
Head banging can be a sign that the child is sleepy. Pay attention to the swinging amplitude. He is perfectly aware of what he is doing and therefore cannot harm himself. Often these wobbles have a certain rhythm. Such movements are more like a ritual dance that allows the baby to quickly go into the world of dreams.
Decision. Before bed, give your baby a warm soothing herbal bath or lavender oil. This procedure will relax him. Give him a massage, tell a story, or sing a lullaby. This will allow him to fall asleep faster.
Health problems
Cause. A child can bang his head due to unpleasant painful sensations that are caused by colds, otitis media, teething and others. In such situations, children are a lot capricious, but they are no longer angry.
Remember how you rocked him, still very little, on his hands, when his tummy ached or his teeth were erupting. And now he begins to sway and bang his head to relieve himself of the discomfort caused by the pain. Another reason for this behavior is childhood autism.
Decision. If the baby beats his head because of malaise very often, then this is already a reason for worry. In this case, it is better to see a doctor and get tested. Perhaps there is a need to give the baby some medications.
Failures and disappointments
Cause. It often happens that a child, playing with the designer, collecting puzzles, starts screaming, freaking out, banging his head on the floor or banging his fists on the head because he does not succeed as it should. He lacks perseverance and patience.
Decision. This case requires a special solution. Such a reaction of a child means dissatisfaction with himself, bewilderment, he does not understand why he does not succeed. If you ignore this, the child will not stop banging his head on the floor. Parents need help here. We need to help the child, build a construction with him from the designer, put together a puzzle with him. Reassure him by saying that not everything works out the first time, even with you.
Knowing yourself
Cause. From the first days of life, the child learns himself and the world around him. At the age of one, the baby becomes more conscious. At this time, he develops an interest not only in everything that surrounds him, but also an interest in his own feelings. One of these sensations is pain.
The child's interest in knowing his painful sensations can also be the reason that the child begins to bang his head on hard surfaces. This children's experiment begins with fitting rooms with weak head bangs. He can test his feelings on softer objects. After the first few experimental head beats, the baby realizes that this is not the limit and then the blows become stronger. The “loads” increase until the child reaches his pain threshold.
Decision. Do not scold your baby for banging his head and hurting himself. The pain experiment will end as soon as the child reaches his maximum. Then your baby's interest will be satisfied and it will no longer make sense for him to hurt himself. Still, look for opportunities to distract your child from this activity.
Study carefully all the reasons for this behavior in children and ways to solve them. There is no point in worrying too much about this. This behavior is seen in about 20% of children aged 2 to 3 years. Most often boys suffer from this.
In most cases, children start banging their heads against the floor or walls as early as one year old, but after three years this usually stops. If a child continues to behave like this until the age of seven, therefore, this is already a manifestation of a spoiled and capricious character. You can only deal with this individually.
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Love your children. Communicate more often with your crumbs, keep secrets, become not only parents, but also friends for your children. Be attentive to yourself and your kids!
What if a child, offended or protesting, starts hitting himself on the head or tries to hit his head against the wall? How should parents behave in such a situation? Is it aggression or not?
