Parents often face childish laziness. However, the reluctance to do something can hide features of temperament, overwork, self-doubt, excessive care and simply lack of motivation. It is very important to help the child find the interest that motivates him, will help to cope with apathy. This is the task of adults. Tips for parents on how to cope with children's laziness.
Probably, every parent was faced with the laziness of their own child. Such situations are very upsetting to us and cause anger and resentment. Why, we are trying so hard for him, and he doesn't even want to wash the dishes after him! We pay money for the section, but he refuses to go there! Often, parents break loose and throw in their hearts: “What a bummer you are!”, “You don't want to do anything at all!”, “Quitter!”.
By saying this, adults additionally reinforce the child in his unwillingness to do something. Bummer so bummer, well, okay. Why bother trying? We ourselves put a label on the child, which he will try to comply with in the future.
In fact, there simply cannot be lazy people among children, because every little person is a bundle of all kinds of desires and seething energy. There are simply guys that adults have not yet found the right approach to.
There are many different reasons behind what we call childish laziness that needs to be dealt with. Knowing the true reason, you can provide invaluable help to a growing personality.
Reasons for children's laziness
- Temperament... The innate properties of the nervous system affect character traits, determine the individual characteristics of a person. It is very difficult for a sanguine or choleric child to be given classes that require prolonged concentration and perseverance. This is more to the liking of phlegmatic and melancholic children. But calm and balanced phlegmatic people do not want to complete a task where you need to quickly respond and actively communicate.
- Self-doubt and fear of possible failure... It happens that a child refuses to complete a task for fear of possible failure. For example, he does not want to prepare a report, which will have to be delivered, because he had a negative experience of public speaking, or he is simply afraid of attention to himself, suffers from shyness. Here, the reason is already psychological and lies in low self-esteem, self-doubt (We also read: Three valuable skills to teach your kids - 3 Don't be afraid of mistakes).
- Overwork... Maybe your child is so busy with studies, additional activities, sports sections that he simply does not have time to physically recover? In the end, he will rebel and refuse to engage in activities that have become overwhelming. In addition, it threatens with illness, in which the body seeks an opportunity to rest. Don't compare your child to others who have time to practice everywhere. All children are different, and chasing someone is the right way to discourage your own child.
- Excessive custody... Often the adults themselves teach the kid to be lazy, not giving the opportunity to work on his own. Mothers and grandmothers clean up the room for the child, fold clothes, wash the dishes for him. When a baby 3-4 years old makes attempts to help around the house, we often tell him: "You are still small, let me do it"... Or the little one wants to get dressed himself, and we, fearing to be late, dress and put on his shoes. Such parental tactics gradually extinguish the child's desire for independence, and then we wonder why he is such a lazy person.
- Finally, the most common reason: lack of motivation... Both the baby and the adult will not want to do something that does not arouse any interest in him. Interest motivates the child from the inside, makes him want to do something, helps to set goals and achieve results, enjoying the process itself. The task of adults: to help the child find such interest and create conditions for its manifestation.
To help your child stop being lazy, help him find a field of activity that is interesting to him. Hobby will become the core on which the child can rely in everyday life, will give an incentive to cope with studies and household chores. Finally, it will increase the little person's self-confidence and overall success.
How to help your child find something to do
- Collect as much information as possible about your child's interests. Talk to him about your favorite cartoons, games, activities. What he likes and dislikes doing, why. Analyze what you know about his tendencies. Surely you can identify a range of interests in a particular area.
- Give your child the opportunity to try their hand at different directions. For example, it seems to you that the kid likes dancing, but he cannot realize this, because there is no opportunity to do them (there is no such circle at school, parents cannot drive far). If you really want your child to get carried away with the business, you have to sacrifice something and give yourself a try.
- Do not criticize or scold the offspring, when something did not work out for him, it turned out to be “not his”. Let him look for himself as much as necessary. Soon he will definitely highlight the most interesting activity for himself.
- Show a genuine interest in his hobby. Rejoice at his successes, grieve at his failures, praise his achievements. If possible, join your child's activities by sharing their interests.
Feeling your support, the child can find himself. What he loves will help him to assert himself in his own strength, to take an active position in life. And most importantly, he will be sure that you love him, understand and support him. This will generate gratitude and a reciprocal desire to help you.
Well, when you see that the child is really lazy, cannot bring himself to do something, the following recommendations will help you.
Fighting child laziness: advice for parents
- Give a specific assignment. For example, “Collect the toys,” “Throw out the trash,” not “What a mess! Take it away immediately! ” (We also read: how to teach a child to help around the house);
- Consider the child's wishes. For example: “Relax for an hour and a half, and sit down to do your homework”, rather than “Sit down now for your lessons!”;
- Make the consequences feel... For example: “Pants and shirt are crumpled, you will have to iron them” and not “She said ten times: hang your clothes in the closet!”;
- Celebrate achievements... For example, “You were not distracted, and completed your homework quickly and correctly!”;
- Encourage and stimulate. For example, “Nice to see how clean your house is! Now we can go for a walk together. "
