Who will help a working mom?

If a young mother decides to work, one of the main problems for her is the lack of time. Caring for children, their development and education, housekeeping, washing-ironing-cooking-cleaning. In this series of repetitive activities, it can be very difficult to carve out time for work, be it handicrafts for sale, writing articles, or opening your own store. To do everything, a young mother just needs helpers.

Recognize the need for help

If you make a list of all the things that a business mom should do in a week, and allocate the necessary amount of time, you get the following picture:

Caring for a child: adherence to the daily routine, walking, feeding, exercising and playing - the more, the better;
Work - 2-8 hours a day;
Housekeeping;
Personal care;
Time with my husband, own vacation.

With this rhythm of life, a woman has about 7 hours to sleep. At the same time, one area of life often suffers, or even several. This gives rise to dissatisfaction, irritability, health problems, and family conflicts. But often women continue to pull both the family and the household on their own fragile shoulders, proudly refusing help. Working without helpers takes time away from your rest and communication with your husband.

Meanwhile, having assistants, a young mother can easily combine childcare and household chores with making money. The main step towards this is to recognize the need for such help, to accept it gratefully and not be shy about asking for it.

We attract a husband

"A good husband should be able to stand up for his wife ... And at the sink with dishes, and at the stove with a saucepan, and at the crib!"

The first reaction of many women to attract their own husbands to assist them varies. One will chuckle skeptically, the other will shake her head in disbelief, the third will simply be indignant. However, it is the husband who should be the first helper, share with his wife everyday problems and concerns about the child. For example, a husband can sometimes cook dinner, buy groceries, walk with the child, feed and bathe him. Even 2 hours of his help with the baby will help you carve out 14 hours of time a week that can be spent on work or other activities.

The question arises: how to attract your husband to participate in household chores? Direct requests often cause confusion and dissatisfaction among men, they are simply ignored. They may be unaccustomed to such a formulation of the question, they are skeptical about a woman's work at home.

Women's wisdom will come to the rescue. See what your husband does best? Maybe he enjoys playing with the child, walking with him and putting him to bed? Or he loves to cook, prides himself on his ability to shop economically. Some men will not refuse to help in business: deliver orders to customers, for example. Find an approach to your own spouse, and he will take over part of your responsibilities.

Very often, women themselves scare off their husbands from household chores, constantly criticizing them for poorly performed work. Remember that by doing this you completely discourage helping you. Be prepared for the fact that at first the floors may not be cleaned clean enough, the food is too salty or burnt, and the laundry is not washed. In order to improve the quality of male labor, use these little tricks:

The husband does not do household chores well enough. Of course, because he does it much less often, besides, he needs to be taught this. The spouse washed the dishes, but there are greasy stains on it? Thank and praise him, just say next time: "Honey, the dishes are very greasy, but I bought an excellent dishwashing detergent, use it."
The spouse does not want to help, considering household chores exclusively for women. Focus on his masculinity, strength. Remember how great he cooks barbecue, and say: “Darling, I bought a good piece of meat, but I'm afraid to spoil it. Please help me while I take care of the child.
The husband simply forgets his promises to do something about the house.... Leave comic reminder notes on the refrigerator, front door, hallway mirror. Turn boring household chores into a game, a treasure hunt, at the end of which a pleasant surprise awaits him!
The spouse is skeptical about his wife's work, considering it a frivolous undertaking... Show him your successes: orders received, results, money earned. Seeing all this, he will respect his wife's occupation.
Be clear when asking for help. Are you running around the apartment trying to redo all the household chores, while your husband is sitting in front of the TV? Maybe he doesn't even realize that you need help, because he is used to the fact that all household chores are on women's shoulders. Do not express your claims in a harsh form, but indicate a specific case that he can help you.
Don't turn specific household chores into ongoing responsibilities... Act according to the circumstances: today he cooked dinner, and tomorrow he took a walk with the child while you cook. This way, no one will have the feeling that they are overwhelmed with routine tasks, but everyone will feel their contribution.

If you want to be successful, praise your husband wisely. "You are great!", "You are so strong!" Are impersonal rewards. Give thanks for specific deeds: “How great are you bathing your baby! He has so much fun with you! "," You helped me so much by making dinner! " - such words will breathe energy into him, and the desire to perform new everyday feats.

Introduce your husband to household chores gradually. This month, let him get used to washing the dishes, next month - walking with the baby, then - cooking dinner. Over time, he will be involved in housework, will respond to requests for help.

How to involve your husband in childcare
How to involve your husband in raising a child

Babysitters and girlfriends as assistants

The best option for a working mother is to invite a nanny to take care of the children and, by agreement, to help with the housework. But nanny services are quite expensive. To save money, you can use the following options:

Carefully study advertising offers, announcements, talk with friends;
To resort to the help of an auto-nanny if the road to the kindergarten and back takes a lot of time. An auto-nanny can take your baby to and from the garden, saving you time and energy;
Agree with young retired neighbors to look after the child for several hours a day. Communication with a baby can be a pleasant pastime for older women, and a small payment is a good bonus to this;
Attract young girls living in the neighborhood or just acquaintances as a nanny;
Find a nanny who looks after several children at the same time at home. It costs significantly less;
Place your child in a private kindergarten for part-time.

You can negotiate with two or three mothers of babies who walk with you on the playground. Taking turns taking the children to your home, each of you can save 4-5 hours a day for work and other matters. If you cooperate with two friends, every three days mayhem and chaos from three children will be in your apartment. But on the other two days you will be free, and the child will undergo social adaptation.

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Grandmothers are the best nannies!

If your grandmother lives in the same city as you, the best solution would be to contact her with a request to sit with the little one. Usually grandmothers themselves express a desire to hang out with their grandson or granddaughter.

If a relative is not happy with this prospect, you can use various options:

Agree with your grandmother for 1-2 days a week, for several hours. Provide her travel to and from home by asking her husband or calling a taxi.
Active grandmothers can be invited to take a walk with a child in a park, playground or shopping center.
Homebody grandmothers can be invited during the quiet hour of the child if you have business outside the home.
Grandmothers can also help with household chores: do the cleaning, cook dinner, do the laundry.

The young mother really needs help, and those around her are well aware of this. A working mother needs this help doubly. By skillfully combining the support of relatives, friends and nannies, you can remain a caring mother, a skillful housewife, a good wife, and succeed in your own business.

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