Why is the baby crying? Does he feel bad, does something hurt? Or tired, overworked? Want to eat or drink? Or maybe it just needs attention?
Parents are divided into two camps. Some believe that crying is a signal of trouble that must be identified and eliminated. Others are of the opinion that nothing will happen to the child, will cry and stop. And in general, let him already learn to control his emotions. Responding to every episode of crying can lead to the child growing up to be spoiled and “loved”. Who is right?
American researchers conducted a number of observations and proved that the maternal instinct is the right thing. Mom should not fight with herself, with her desire to take the crying baby in her arms and comfort him. Moreover, this will definitely not lead to negative consequences, on the contrary, it will help the baby to develop correctly and harmoniously.
The baby is unable to deal with his emotions or to curb them - the child's self-control develops only in the older preschool age, then volitional qualities begin to form. If, having shouted, a very small baby becomes silent, this does not mean that he has realized all the wrongness of his behavior. This means that he was desperate to call his parents for help.
About six hundred families took part in the study conducted by the scientists, and the researchers analyzed the data for different periods, including not only childhood, but also adulthood. As it turned out, it is impossible to spoil the child with hugs, kisses, gentle words and other manifestations of tenderness following crying. On the contrary, children who do not experience a deficit in parental love and affection develop better, behave more calmly, even in stressful situations. But if you do not react to the crying of a child, then this can negatively affect the normal and natural course of his development and becoming as a person. In the future, this method of upbringing may lead to uncertainty, increased nervous excitability, and low self-esteem.
Can you be pampered with attention and care? No. On the contrary, those children who at one time were not given warmth and love grow up spoiled. Therefore, they always want the most. And toys, and attention, and affection. It's like they're trying to get all this stuff for the future.
Scientists emphasized that the behavior of parents and their interaction with the child plays a very important role in development and directly affects it. Moreover, the negative impact extends not only to the psyche, but also to physical health. It has been proven that children who are deprived of attention grow weaker and sicker, which is associated with the negative impact of the stress that the child experiences every time he is left alone with his fears, that is, crying alone. The researchers also noted that it is necessary to form the correct behavior from the first months of a baby's life.
Such a baby grows up with a subconscious feeling that no one needs him. This is a very destructive feeling. It is this that gradually becomes the cause of behavior problems in childhood and adolescence, depression, neuroses.
Love your children, and let them know about your love: hug, comfort, do not stop crying alone!
Read also:
- How to calm down a crying child (31 tips. Part 2). + 5 steps according to Harvey Karp's method
- How to quickly calm a newborn baby when he is crying, hysterical, naughty
The reasons for crying children - School of Dr. Komarovsky
