Hi everyone! Today we will talk about what to do when a child bites his nails.
One of the most common baby habits is the habit of chewing. Many parents believe that nail biting is quite normal for a baby, and therefore they do not act.
In this video, psychologist Marina Romanenko talks about the reasons for this bad habit, what it can lead to, life hacks for every day, about how to quickly and easily wean a child from biting his nails:
The child bites his nails - what to do about it?
This is one of such very popular questions of parents, many have faced this when children simply bite their nails to the blood and after that it is impossible even to grow a nail plate. She is constantly nibbled and the nails of many children begin to exfoliate.
Why does the child bite his nails?
In fact, if we consider psychosomatics, then this suggests that the child is experiencing anxiety. Somewhere in his life, he is uncomfortable.
This may not apply to money. The family may be well off, but the child bites his nails. This is more related to the internal state - somewhere, something, somehow he is uncomfortable. And at this moment in time, he unconsciously takes his fingers into his mouth and begins to gnaw them.
What should parents not do?
- You can't scold.You can't scold because you add discomfort, and instead of him stopping biting his nails, he will bite them even more, being in a state of stress, nervous tension. Therefore, you cannot exactly scold.
- You can't get angry.You can't constantly bump or get angry with your child, or get upset about biting his nails because seeing your upset will make him nervous too. He loves you, doesn't want to upset you, and at some point in time will start biting his nails even more.
What should parents do?
You need to calm down. There is a technique that works well, and I’ll tell you about it now. It's simple.
1. Buy special covers
In fact, there are many remedies from the fact that children do not bite their nails, from the fact that there are such special covers for fingers that dress and the child simply does not have access, he cannot bite them. For some children it worked and for some it didn't. Try it! They are sold in pharmacies and children's stores.
2. Treat with tasteless ointment
The second point - there are many ointments that cover the fingertips. They are not tasty, and for some of the children it worked, they stopped gnawing, tried - tasteless, do not gnaw. And someone, like hedgehogs in a joke, “cried and continued to eat cacti”. They continue to bite their nails, it is terribly tasteless, bitter, but they bite them.
Therefore, if your child is such that neither mustard nor any special ointments have worked, then the following option will probably suit you.
3. Calm the nervous system
The nervous system needs to be calmed. The method that I will now talk about is suitable for children who bite their nails, for those who pick their nose, suck their fingers, and constantly pull their earlobe - these are some of the same type of movements. Or it also happens - in the navel, a child, if he is nervous, can tear the navel right apart.
Announce to your child that now you are changing everything, a joyful day has come, and now you can bite your nails, pick your nose, stick your finger in the navel - you can at a certain time every day.
Do it joyfully, make it a holiday, relieve this tension - because a child for years of life is with you every time he hears: “Stop doing this! Take your fingers out of your nose! Stop biting your nails! " - he hasn't stopped doing it, but he still shudders every time you tell him this.
Therefore, announce that it is possible, solemnly declare it as a holiday - it is possible! - for example, from 17-00 to 17-15 every day! Make a solemn promise to your child that whatever he is doing, at this time you will call him, and this will be the time when it will be possible to bite your nails completely openly.
What not to do?
There will be no need to remind him at another time that he is chewing. Even if he chews on them, keep quiet. At 17-15 he will consciously do this, and before that it is just out of habit. In order not to intensify the gnawing, keep yourself in control and be silent until a certain time.
- Call your child, whatever he is doing, at the appointed time.
- Take him to the mirror, say: "The time has passed!"
- Start a timer and let it chew!
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If he chewed his nails with joy for as long as 12 minutes, and you have 15 according to plan, you say: "Dear (or dear), you still have 3 whole minutes, go on!"
And he continues to bite his nails - day, second, third, still rejoicing. But on the fourth day, when he watches his favorite cartoon, and you call him to bite his nails, he no longer wants to. You say, “Sorry, these are the rules! Come on, stop the cartoon! " Be kind, benevolent: "You have time, let's go!"
What's happening?
In a very short period of time, when this behavior is brought to a conscious level, and he can do it, moreover, you encourage him to do it, the nervous system is rebooted. She goes from the stress level to the level "good, you can, ok, relaxed, have fun, have fun, have fun ..."
Enjoy it? No, I don't want to do this anymore!
And gradually, gradually, gradually, the child wants more and more painfully to bite his nails at the right time. He no longer wants to do this! And the habit gradually goes away.
But she leaves easily, leaves without tearing, without screaming, without scandals, without jerking the child's nervous system and yours when you see that he chews his nails, or makes a number of other movements, which I have already mentioned.
Try this method, it works great! The only thing, please, agree with all members of your family so that they stop making comments to the child if they see him biting his nails.
Remember that the habit may come back at a particularly stressful moment, and he will unconsciously stick his fingers in his mouth and start gnawing, but if the stress goes away, then that will go away.
Try it! And you will definitely succeed. You will see how easy it is to get rid of it.
Well, and of course, it will be very useful if you think about what your child is missing, at what point in time he starts to get nervous, and how to avoid this in order to continue to live in a world where it is calm, where there is harmony, where accept as it is, and that's it!
And one more very important point
You know, when we say to a child, “Don't bite your nails!”, Of course, he understands that we are saying this, but the brain does not understand, and then what? If not gnaw, then what? Therefore, it is sometimes easier to tell the child: "Put your hands in your pocket!" or "Bring me this" or "Take something in your hands!" - and you give him, no matter what you have in your hands, you simply redirect his brain in the other direction.
And no matter what he does - picking his ear, nose, navel, biting his nails - when you say "Put your hands in your pocket!", He automatically stops doing it and puts his hands in his pocket.
This, of course, will not solve the problem globally, but the small town, from time to time, will work very well because you gave the right command to the brain, and it understands what to do.
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