For many men, joint childbirth is a situation when the wife gives birth, and he watches from the side. However, this is not the case. A woman in labor during childbirth needs support, which she hopes to receive from the person closest to her - her husband. And this is not only while she is expecting the birth itself and endures labor, but also during the process itself. Before you - three personal stories of men who participated in partner childbirth and do not regret it at all.
When men are offered joint childbirth with their wife, many refuse, fearing that they will not stand the procedure. Three happy fathers decided to support their spouse at the most crucial moment and told how they survived the partner birth.
Authors' spelling and punctuation preserved
Kirill, 35 years old, twice participated in joint childbirth, he took his second child himself
"The ambulance arrived 20 minutes after giving birth."
I believe that at the moment a child is born, it is very important that a close person is with the woman in labor, on whom she can rely and who worries about her and seeks to help.
During the birth of our first child, I was next to my wife, massaging her lower back to relieve pain, helping to relax, asking the doctors questions, and at times I just sat there and watched. When she was given pain medication, she was able to rest for a while. I could watch the birth process and was there all the time. In general, everything was calm.
The second childbirth was rapid - even at home, before the doctors arrived, attempts began. I was scared, I was afraid that I would do something wrong, because I have no medical knowledge. At one point, I even tried to remember how a direct heart massage is done.
I “commanded” how and when to push, and I gave clean sheets. To calm down, I mentally told myself that women have given birth for centuries at home and even in the field, that childbirth is a natural process. Fortunately, everything ended well with us, a healthy daughter was born. The doctors arrived 20 minutes after the baby was born.
During both births, I was unpleasantly surprised by the incorrect behavior of the medical staff. When I was in the delivery room for the first time, they told me: "Turn away, otherwise you will lose consciousness." Perhaps doctors had to see fainting spells of young fathers, but I consider such a remark inappropriate. During the second birth, the obstetricians accused me of giving my daughter a bruise on her arm. In fact, it was a birthmark.
Igor, 32 years old, took part in the birth of his wife twice
"I didn't think I would have to participate in saving a life."
The first time I took the initiative - I didn't want to leave my loved one at such a serious moment. Before the second birth, I did not even doubt whether I was present or not. I believe that during the birth of a baby, in addition to a medical person, there should be someone close to the woman in labor who will provide support. The hardest thing for me was to maintain self-control and remove unnecessary emotions. A man in the process of giving birth to his wife should be calm and confident.
It is very annoying that the process of childbirth is impossible to control, their outcome is completely unpredictable. We had an extreme situation when the child could not pass through the pelvic bones due to the large size of the head. We could have lost our son, since for some time he could not breathe. I used to think that it was a man's job during labor to hold his wife's hand, speak encouraging words, and give a relaxing massage. I didn't think that I would have to participate in saving a life.
Whether the baby was born alive depended on our decisive actions; colossal physical stress was required from the wife. Fortunately, everything turned out well, the wife and son are alive and well.
It's hard for me to describe how I felt when I first saw my newborn son. This joy, this happiness cannot be described in words.
Ivan, 38 years old, participated in childbirth once
"The hardest thing is to wait"
I have always believed that being present at childbirth is not a man's business. But then I thought how hard it would be for my wife without a loved one and decided to support her.
The most difficult thing for me was the long wait. Before going to the hospital, we wrote in social networks: "We went to give birth." Friends sent us messages on social networks, encouraged us, asked how we were. And we just waited.
I was very scared when my wife was given an epidural. A spine prick looks very creepy. I really wanted to shout to the doctors: what you are doing is not necessary.
When my son was born, they gave me the opportunity to cut the umbilical cord. Then I held him in my arms, his eyes were open. I carried my son to the children's department, thinking: here he is, the child I have been waiting for so long.
When they ask me what I saw during childbirth, I answer that I saw a miracle. I witnessed the birth of a man.
- Childbirth in partnership with her husband: the pros and cons of joint childbirth, which is important for dad to know
- My birth went well thanks to my husband
- Demyan Popov: partner childbirth in detail, pros and cons
Fathers' comments on partner childbirth (taken from the forums)
- Advice from the dad, who gave birth with his wife - The impressions are very different, the most difficult is to watch when a loved one has contractions, and when the process itself is already going on, it’s easier, like the light is already visible at the end of the tunnel 🙂 In principle, the wife said that I helped her a lot. For example, I don't remember driving home after giving birth. So it's up to you ... Personally, I would advise you to think about the decision to give birth together.
- I was discouraged, they said that they say you won't see anything good there, but psychological problems may arise. I did not agree with all the advisers and was present at the birth, helped, which I do not regret at all. There is nothing terrible, dirty and the like there. Everything is quite natural and normal. There are no psychological problems at all. I began to treat my wife even better. So, if you really want to, then why not.
- The impressions are strong. But we didn’t give birth in a maternity hospital, but at home with a midwife, so my participation was necessary and very active. 🙂 I worked as a medical brother, husband, support in every sense, a massager, a stool, a hanger (for the wife, not for clothes) ... I worked hard, but we all (especially the wife) got a lot from it. 🙂 And to be present ... If you don't know what to do and how to help, stand helplessly and watch what the doctors are doing? IMHO nafig-nafig, it's better to do something useful at home. Here it is necessary to put the question differently - if the wife needs it, and you are ready to support her, and even more so you know how and with something - of course yes ...
