Causes of hysteria in children of different ages. How to prevent a child's tantrum? Psychologist's advice on how to cope with child tantrums.
Surely every parent has at least once faced childish tantrums. They appear, it seems, for no reason and end just as suddenly, but they bring a lot of excitement to all adults. Is it possible to prevent a child's emotional outburst that has begun? What if the baby is hysterical? The advice of a child psychologist will help tired parents cope with such problems and bring harmony to family life.
Causes of hysteria in children of different ages
In order to learn how to cope with attacks of hysteria in children of different ages, you must first find out their causes.
Tantrums in a 2-year-old child
A two-year-old often uses tantrums to get additional attention from adults. He has several effective methods in his arsenal: loud screams, stubbornness, rolling on the floor in places where there is an audience. Psychologists say that this behavior is natural for a small child due to the imperfection of his emotional system. He still cannot express in words his indignation if parents refuse to do something or forbid to do something.
At this age, the baby is already beginning to separate himself from adults, and is also actively studying the world around him. However, on his way there are all sorts of restrictions designed to ensure his safety on the street and at home.
A 2-year-old's whims are often a reflection of their own physical condition: tiredness, hunger, or lack of sleep. Perhaps the excess of new impressions overworked the baby. To calm him down, sometimes it is enough just to take on the handles, pat on the head in order to distract from the situation that caused the hysterical behavior.
READ ALSO: 13 tricks for mom when a child is whimsical and crying
Enrollment in preschool, the birth of a younger brother or sister, and the divorce of parents can also trigger tantrums. In order to relieve tension, the baby begins to knock with his feet, scatter toys and scream loudly.
Another reason for "bad" behavior can be excessive strictness of parents. In this case, hysterics acts as a desire to resist this style of education and to defend their own independence.
Tantrums in a 3-year-old child
Especially vivid tantrums, appearing seemingly out of the blue, are noticeable at the age of three. This period, which in psychology is called the crisis of three years, is expressed differently in all children, but negativism, self-will and extreme stubbornness are considered the main symptoms. Yesterday, an obedient kid does the opposite today: he undresses when he is wrapped up warmly, runs away when his name is called.
Frequent tantrums at this age are explained not by a desire to anger parents, but by the usual inability to compromise and express their desires. Having received the right thing with the help of whims, the child will continue to manipulate adults to achieve his own goals.
By the age of four, hysterical attacks usually disappear by themselves, since the baby can already express his feelings in words.
Tantrums in a child 4-5 years old
Whims and tantrums in children over four years old are often the result of parenting mistakes. The child is allowed everything, he knows about the existence of the word "no" only by hearsay. Even if mom does not allow, you can always turn to dad or grandmother.
Constant hysterical behavior in a 4-year-old child can be a serious warning sign of a problem with the nervous system. If the baby behaves aggressively during a tantrum, damages himself and others, holds his breath or loses consciousness, vomiting, lethargy or fatigue is observed after an attack, then you should contact a neurologist.
If the baby's health is all right, then the reasons for whims and tantrums lie in the family and the reactions of loved ones to his behavior.
Important:2 types of tantrums in children and the correct reaction of parents
How to prevent a tantrum
The best way to deal with a tantrum is to prevent it. Although psychologists say that all children go through these attacks, you can try to reduce the frequency and severity of emotional outbursts.
- Maintain a daily routine. Young children and preschoolers feel safe when they adhere to a well-established routine. Hunger and sleepiness are probably the most common causes of tantrums. They can be avoided by following your normal daily bedtime and meal schedule.
- Prepare your child for change. Make sure to warn him well in advance of major changes, such as the first day of kindergarten. By giving your baby time to adjust, you will reduce the likelihood of tantrums.
- Be firm. If the child feels that he can influence your decisions with the help of tantrums, he will continue to manipulate you to get his way. Make sure he knows you are making tough decisions and will not change your mind in response to bad behavior.
- Review your inhibitions. Before you deny a request to your child, ask yourself if your prohibition is really necessary. Why doesn't your son have a snack if dinner is late? You can avoid a tantrum simply by making him a sandwich. Don't apply rules just for the sake of rules, rethink prohibitions.
- Provide a choice. Already from two years old, the little one is achieving greater autonomy. Offer him simple choices to make him feel like a self-reliant person. For example, offer your child a choice between oatmeal and cornflakes for breakfast. Just don't ask a question like: "What would you like to eat?" You risk getting a completely unnecessary answer. Ask: "Are you going to eat porridge or cereals?"
- Pay more attention. For a child, even bad attention is better than none. Make sure to spend enough time and respond to his basic needs for love and affection.
We look at how to stop children's tantrums
If the hysteria has already begun ...
If the baby is capricious, distract him, find out what he is dissatisfied with, try to eliminate the cause of his dissatisfaction. However, the distraction method only works when the tantrum is just beginning. What to do if the child has already entered an emotional rage?
- Make it clear that yelling and screaming does not affect you, they will not help you change your mind. If the tantrum is not very strong, say: “Sunny, say calmly what you need. I don't understand you when you scream. " If the hysterical attack is already severe, then you had better leave the room. Talk to your baby when he calms down.
- Try to isolate the child at the height of the emotional outburst. If this happens at home, then leave him alone in the nursery, and if on the street - take him to where there are no other children and adults.
- During whims, always behave the same way so that the baby can understand that his behavior is ineffective.
- Explain how you can express your dissatisfaction in positive ways. From the age of two, teach your baby to use a description of emotions in his speech. For example, "I am upset", "I am angry", "I am bored."
- Monitor your feelings. Young children are easily infected with other people's emotions. So your aggression can only exacerbate the situation.
- Be patient. If tantrums have already become traditional for the child, do not expect that everything will go away immediately after the first time you leave the room and calmly explain everything to him. It will take some time for the new model to take hold.
You should not be afraid of hysterics in children, you need to learn to respond to them correctly. If you've tried all of the tips listed in our article, but you still experience outbursts of anger in your child, seek professional help.
